Tuesday, January 6, 2009

Where The Fuck Is Bridget?


The world can now take a huge collective sigh of relief, Hugh Hefner has found his 3rd and only skank. Crystal Harris, 22, can now take a seat at the table of dishonor as she was chosen to be the newest member of the "ride em' till he dies" clan. Crystal is attending San Diego State University as a psychology student and according to her Myspace she supports PETA and enjoys the rain, the seasons & caring and honest people. Wtf?? We wanted another slut like Kendra not some Mother Teresa wannabe!!

She joins 19 year old twins Karissa and Kristina Shannon, otherwise known as Buttahface Thing 1 and Buttahface Thing 2. According to Crystal on the E! online message boards, "Hef gave me permission to fill people in on the new updates as a voice from the mansion," and went on to say as far as other ladies are concerned "there are a couple that we have interest in. As for now, it is just us three.”

It's comforting to know that as you get older, a broken heart can mend in a matter of weeks..that is if your heart is still beating.


Image: Getty Images

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